How should I use my fundraiser earnings?

We here at GoFundYourself are happy to say that you can use your money however you like! You could start with a jetski and see where it takes you from there. Sky's the limit!

How do I get my money?

Please set up a bank account either on the Dark Web or in the Virgin Islands. That's where all the Illuminati keep their money, so why shouldn't you?

Will I get in trouble with the government?

Of course, it's natural to be worried about your fundraiser being investigated by the FBI, (commonly known as 'charity fraud', 'larceny', or 'embezzlement'), and you should be! What you're doing is definitely illegal, more than likely breaks federal laws, which means you're looking at around a decade of prison time on top of thousands of dollars of fines, but we here at GoFundYourself cannot stress enough how this is not our problem.

Is this really a moral thing to do?

GoFundYourself subscribes to the philosophical school of moral relativism, which posits that morality is subject to the era and culture within which a particular judgment is being made, and therefore it is the absolutist's position which is fundamentally limiting, whilst a normative relativist stance suggests that a tolerance of all moral attitudes is the only satisfactory response. And if you realize that we wrote this grandiloquent answer to get out of answering the original question, then please check out our job board because we'd love to have you on the team at GoFundYourself.